Happy Father's Day, Papa!

You aren't perfect. Too far from being perfect at the very least. There was even a time when I would sulk in the corner of our house and bitterly weep, "why of all fathers, you're unfortunately mine?" That was during those times when we're struggling to live a normal life in spite of all those hardships. But looking back, I am very happy that you are my father. You may not always support my every decision, but your principles in life made its way to help me mould the better me.

I am very thankful for all those words of wisdom you've given me, for all those scoldings everytime I get way out of line. I admit I am not the best daughter either. That is why I have all those words from you. But I swear, I did not do all those things in purpose just to make you feel bad. Maybe it was just part of my growing up years.

When I see how you fondly look after my little sisters and little cousins, I always tell myself that maybe, that was how you look after me when I was at that same age, things I cannot remember clearly anymore. But I can remember clearly those times when you would tuck me in bed and kiss my forehead, those years when I am still afraid of the dark and you will say you will be by my side even after I wake up.

I remember clearly your proud expression everytime I go up the stage during my elementary years, and you are the one pinning my ribbons and medals, and how you would boast to your friends everytime I get small achievements. I can remember the pride on your face when I gave you my college diploma after I say, "Pa, this is for you" and I can remember the most your expression when I broke the news to you that I am already a registered nurse.

You may not always tell us that you love us, but it shows. How you struggle to be the best provider you can be may not be the best for others, but I can see your effort. I can see how you almost kill yourself working at the farm we do not even own, and how you would get lowly every time floods would hit our crops, but I also see the strength in you, standing up again after all those storms our lives have faced.

You and mom are always included in my prayers. That He always give you strength, good health, and good life. For now, aside from helping you send my siblings to school, that's the only thing that I can do for you now that I am miles away from you.

I told you I love you lots of times when I was young, but I didn't think I have told you those three words lately. So I would like to take this opportunity to say it again. I love you. I know you always yearn to hear those words from your children. We may not always say it, and our actions may not always convey so, but you will always be in our hearts.

Can you believe I'm crying now? The first time I have cried since I arrived here in this foreign land. I know you would scold me again if ever you will see my tears without any reason. But I just realized, I'm missing you badly. I always tell myself to be strong, because I have no one but me in here, but my strong facade is slowly melting away. I guess I need you to build up that strength again..:(

Happy father's day, Papa! I love you and I'm missing you!